i hate when my hands shake

That’s the worst part,

in a horrible, no good, very bad way. I’m better than I used to be. Even being in her town, my whole body would react. My heart would beat faster; my body would react as if I were under threat.

I can handle being around her, even. Without my whole body betraying me. But my hands?

My hands still shake sometimes, when something particular happens. Or I lose all feeling. I can’t open things. Sometimes I drop things.

I hate the shaking so much.

“I Must Not Fear. Fear Is The Mind-Killer. Fear Is The Little Death That Brings Obliteration.”

I hate that I lose control.

I cannot control my hands like the Lady Jessica, or her son Paul.

So my hands will keep shaking.

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