All Kitty’s Musings!

Kitty’s observations & thoughts on how the world worked, works, and might work in the future. Take her cautionary wisdom with a grain of salt. After all, she is a mere Kitten, not a psychologist. But still. She sees things, and sometimes people tell her they’re worth seeing.

Topics include: Polyamory, BDSM, Relationships, & More!

Enjoy, please!

lessons on “green flags”: pt 1: when someone isn’t who you think they are
Red flags are fairly straight forward. Things you don’t want. Things to avoid. But sometimes we see a behavior and we are sure it means something terrible- but it turns out it was only a big, old, red flag. This person wasn’t trying to isolate you (red flag of an abuser and predator); they just …

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i crave being owned, as she craves a white wedding gown or bruises
Someone shared their love of impact the other day. It’s difficult to explain to the outside, vanilla world that pain and suffering are chosen freely here. It was nice to have the words put simply and clearly. This– is why I love it. This– is why I chose it. Only, for myself, I don’t need …

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lessons on “green flags”:  pt 2: how do you know if it’s real?
Okay, so you understand red flags, negative traits, green flags, positive traits. You’ve just met the person. Initially, they do something that sets off your spidey senses. They showed up late to your first date, come on! After that, though, they never show up late again and you live happily ever after. Red flag averted. …

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If kinky folk talked about Dom(mes) like vanilla people talk about Parents, AKA, “Well, most dom(mes) are just doing their best, alright?”
Well, after all, most dom(mes) are like that, right? None of us are perfect. It’s really hard to be a dominant.  Don’t judge them, you don’t even know what it’s like to do what they do.  We shouldn’t blame a submissive’s bad experience on the dom(me). Submissives need to seek whatever help they need in …

If kinky folk talked about Dom(mes) like vanilla people talk about Parents, AKA, “Well, most dom(mes) are just doing their best, alright?” Read More »

how to bring a date to a munch: kitty edition!
Okay, so I thought it might be fun to just help out with a few light, fun “how to” guides on kink, munches, dating, etc. If you need a bit of help, here you go! 1. DO Treat your date like a person. Yup! That’s the first part. They are still a normal human being, …

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when love is a gift
“What is love,” someone asked me. “You mean being in love, or love itself?” “Both?” Well, let me ponder that. “Being ‘in love’ is an infatuation. At least, it appears so.  It’s used by the same sort of people, in my experience, as those who use phrases like ‘protect the relationship’ or ‘I give 100% …

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sometimes joys of living together, the
I come home most days to a person I love, to whom I’m committed in life and love. I would venture to say most of us do, or hope to one day. Pair-bonding is natural with social creatures; humans are social; easier to bond and share time when you share same space. It’s nice to live with the one you love, or can be. But the writing made me want to puke.
single life isn’t unhappy, the
Okay, so I’m not exactly single. But I do check the “Single” box on my taxes.  Does that count?  I’ll overrule for the moment, and say, yes.  Yes, it counts. Besides, it would be okay if I were absolutely single.  It’s infuriating that society derides the single life.  Oh, Being Single is fine when you’re young …

single life isn’t unhappy, the Read More »

when you get almost everything you want, AKA the stupid, spoiled bitch syndrome
You’re a silly, stupid, spoiled bitch my critical inner voice whispers. What, getting ninety percent of what you want isn’t enough for you? My beauty whispers to me, Of course it’s enough. It’s enough, I’m enough, you’re enough. I should listen to her kindness, her unabashed love towards me. But I don’t want “enough.” I want more. I want …

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