“Hello, my name is Kitten and I like mental domination. Yourself?”
When I’m at a munch, or a friend’s party, I’m not subtle about my kinks– even to perfect strangers. If you can’t talk to me about everything, I don’t want to talk to you about anything. Because that desire to find out about each other is what drew us to this munch or this club or a mutual acquaintance’s home.
The problem is, I’m often in a non kinky setting. And I can’t exactly talk about my preferences. So I try to talk about “safe” stuff. It’s not too hard. I’ll try to talk about whatever it is we have in common. And most of my life isn’t that kinky, anyway, nor can I only speak on one subject.
But that means I can’t talk about a lot of me. My vanilla friends don’t want to hear about my “personal life,” or I can’t trust that they want to do so. Because I hear what people say and I think, If they knew I had a girlfriend and a partner, they might be uncomfortable. I don’t wish to upset anyone. I’m okay staying within another person’s comfort.
It’s not a big deal, and I can certainly handle not showing off my lifestyle, or posting pictures on Facebook of my triad (frankly, I’m not impressed when anyone posts sappy posts of their relationship, especially when I know what the relationship is like behind closed doors). But it would be pleasant if I could mention them once in a while.
“Oh, I wasn’t up to much this weekend. A friend’s birthday party.”
Because I know that the birthday girl sometimes gets birthday spanks– but does she usually get them with a flogger, sprawled naked on the bed? Can’t mention the girls tied up on the bedposts or from the ceiling. The naked dancing. The fire play, and how my girlfriend tried it—in public!— for the first time. How proud I was of her. Maybe they’ll understand. Maybe they’ll drop me altogether. It’s never an exact science.
I don’t care that much. Truly. It would, however, be oh, so, wonderfully nice if I didn’t have to be careful in what say and to whom I say it. That’s my tiny, annoying problem to deal with.
It would just be a little sweeter, if…I could tell them about the rest of me.
Everything else about the kinky lifestyle is great!