On Polyamory

When one love simply isn’t enough, what does one do? Sink into one’s own pity? Or seek more love in places one never expected to find it? Healthy relationships are healthy relationships; polyamory is very little different than anything else. Find out what Kitty means as you delve into the world of polyamory!

it’s okay to Commit in polyamorous relationships
…it is, I swear. Commitment is such a strange word. Some of us are terrified of it. Some of us believe others are scared of it, or at least tell ourselves that. I keep seeing this myth perpetrated that people are attracted to polyamory because they are “scared of commitment,” which sounds absurd in a …

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“am I polyamorous?”: a fairly foolproof test
Am I polyamorous? So many ways to interpret the question. Some people want the word to mean anything and everything. Bit frustrating. I got this all the time, as a queer person, when it came to defining bisexuality. Meeting women who said they were bi, but meant, “I like to make out with women in …

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on shedding sexual (or romantic) ownership
Jealousy is a powerful driver. It can consume and destroy lives.  I still remember the oldest munchkin, then age 6, sighing as she shook her head, “Jealousy.”  (We were talking about her biological mother, and she brought the word up, not me.) But her mother feels jealousy over her children.  I am at a loss …

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further thoughts on “More Than Two”: you’ll never find “all” the monsters
A reminder of the quote from More Than Two, “Make sure there are no monsters under your bed before you do it, because if there are any weak points in your relationship if there is anything you’re not sure about, if there are any little fears or insecurities you have polyamory will find them it …

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you gave me the world
I heard that promise many times before, but what they meant is they wanted to take the world from me and replace it with them. They didn’t want to give me the world; rather they wanted to hide me from it. They were afraid for me to go out in the world without them. Afraid …

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real reason I chose polyamory, the
Ah, why do we do anything we do? I’m home relaxing this past weekend and watching TV. On my latest obsession, the female lead (Teresa Lisbon) is at home with her boyfriend. He asks her if she wants to watch Casablanca. “It’s about a woman who has to choose between two men.” He pauses a …

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is polyamory “better” than monogamy?
Did you see the 30 Rock episode where Jon Hamm plays the eternally clueless, super sexy guy, because everybody is so in love with him they can’t criticize a single thing he does? Liz: You can’t put Gatorade on salmon. Drew: Yes you can – the hot Italian lady from the Food Network told me …

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earned compersion vs. “natural” compersion
“Compersion isn’t necessary in a relationship!” scream many in the polyamorous community. I understand it may be a difficult concept, but the truth is I find that sentiment, bluntly received, rather crap. If I care about your happiness in your life, and, yes, romantic relationships, I expect the same consideration in return. Why should I care …

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short history of the unicorn:  poly edition, a
I realize after my last post that not everyone may be familiar with the term unicorn. Hence, a brief explanation.
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