Some people need to learn to be a “me.” They’ve never been on their own. Don’t even know what it means to be themselves, apart from a Romantic Other. Suddenly find themselves cast on their own and…have no clue. Utterly adrift, no direction, no purpose. It’s scary. Others need to learn to be a “we.” …
Okay, okay, there’s clearly no such thing. Still, I’ve run into quite a bit of trouble on this matter. I’d like to air a few thoughts. Women seem to either want both my master and I, or want to come in between us. That’s how it’s pretty much always been. Yet I’ve continued to have …
Tonight, I made dinner for my partner and my oldest munchkin. It’s not much, but it’s tasty and everyone likes it. But it’s not the food that matters. The oldest can find food for herself (though admittedly she’s not very good at it). So can my master. They are not helpless. But, as I said, …
relationships that are wants, and the relationships that are needs, the Read More »
“I’m holding out for a hero ’til the end of the night,” The words blast through the car. I sit back, and I listen to the song. Sometimes I even sing along. I love cheesy musicals, okay? I watch Disney movies for the music. I’m not proud, I’m me. Of course, that isn’t what I …
I usually say that I won’t date anyone who is monogamous. But that’s not entirely true. I’ve allowed people to date me, exclusively, if they preferred that. Only with individuals capable of meeting their own needs and wants, of course. Still, it’s not my preference. I prefer to date people who want to dive fully …
how to treat someone like an option that treats you like an option Read More »
My master wasn’t very much in my life at first, nor did I think he’d ever be. When I first met my master, he was with someone else. I had to accept being less than number one for him, or accept someone else. I chose him. But it meant a number of compromises. He was …
How they made you feel, what they said to you? I remember flashes. A woman’s blackbird tattoo; experimenting with smoking after sex; this super fun bunkbed in a loft, like I was making love in Moulin Rouge; the time I walked in public with both halves of a couple holding my hand, unashamed to be …
Ah, NRE. That glowing period in a new relationship that can last anywhere from a day to six months (or even longer!). Say, six to nine months. About how long it takes to make a baby. The honeymoon of the relationship. Everything is shiny and wonderful. Except I have to admit I’m not sure I …
I suppose this is in contrast to those that can sleep with “anyone.” Or are attracted to hot bodies in photos. Obviously there are plenty of folk that are visually stimulated.
I come home most days to a person I love, to whom I’m committed in life and love. I would venture to say most of us do, or hope to one day. Pair-bonding is natural with social creatures; humans are social; easier to bond and share time when you share same space. It’s nice to live with the one you love, or can be. But the writing made me want to puke.