a beautiful li(f)e
A beautiful lie, life. Why don’t I want it? Feels like every other woman does. I’m sure it seems beautiful to others Promising grand things nobody ever delivers. It isn’t ugly to me, Just empty. Blank. Nothing.
Kitty’s Journal
words that corrupt the kitten, mind, body, soul, the
“Breathe, kitten.” She wasn’t an innocent when she first met Him. Awkard, perhaps, and slightly gullible. She did not know what she was getting into when she first said, yes. But she knew this was not the same as her past encounters, and, yes, conquests. So she opened herself, in a way she had not, …
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you gave me the world
I heard that promise many times before, but what they meant is they wanted to take the world from me and replace it with them. They didn’t want to give me the world; rather they wanted to hide me from it. They were afraid for me to go out in the world without them. Afraid …
nobody could take Him away from her
…nobody, but nobody, could take this moment from her. She sank into his arms at the end of another drawn out day. Why would someone want to hurt her like that? She didn’t understand. “You know I will never abandon you,” His words poured into her being. She knew, of course she knew, but the …
tired of the lies
So many stupid, pointless, damaging lies, Some woman he’s just met yesterday told she’s just as important as his partner of twenty years. Of course she isn’t, and it only hurts when she’s treated “less.” Why say the same sugar coated lies that someone told her in any monogamous relationship, how she was the most …
it doesn’t feel like winning today
“You won,” my friend says. And I guess I needed to hear that message. After all the shit we’ve been through, what we’re left with today is nothing more than what we started out with a decade ago. But it’s different. It doesn’t look different, but it feels different. Sometimes winning simply means getting back …
snowstorms, loneliness, beauty, joy, and scalding showers
Dancing in the shower to some corny 90s pop song, beautifully scalding water cascading down my shoulders, back, over my curves. I could lose myself in the joy of the moment, or I could pout that master is not joining me tomorrow night. stupid snowmaggaden mrr mrr meh I am a very happy little kitten. …
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kitty & master life: part four
I cannot sleep, as per usual. Well, usual enough. My mind jumps and darts in a million directions. Naturally, I begin to play with myself. From the other side of the bed, a voice tells me, “Now.” I jerk in response, my fingers instinctively quickening in pace. “C’mon, kitten,” his voice slips across the sheets. …
when blood is thicker than water (and as precious)
Blood is thicker than water, so some say (I am making a personal commitment to myself to stop saying ‘they say,’ because I despise it). Yet my chosen family is closer to me than many blood relatives. But I can’t say there is nothing to the bond of family by blood. A child raised by a …
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rain in the desert
When you get almost everything you want, you sometimes forget about the little niceties you failed to win. Other times, it’s all you can think about. I’m thinking about it today. Dumb, ridiculous me. It’s the ask, that’s what it comes down to. I want to be happy in our new life. With our two …