Ah, honesty! We speak of honesty and authenticity as this beautiful, wonderful, desired thing. Which it is to many. It can be utterly freeing to drop the facade and be one’s “true” self (after all, our selves may change, and we may not have “one true self”). But it can also be terrifying. Honesty can […]
when honesty isn’t a positive Read More »
what does she want, you ask? She wants to be SEEN, and she wants to be LOVED for everything inside of her. She wants to be SAFE. She wants to feel DESIRED. ….it is what we all want. The essentials. Regardless of sex, gender, identity. Give that to a person, and they will be yours
Greed is normal, jealousy is normal. But what does “normal” even mean? Is it what is common? What is natural? What is right? I go to a doctor, I say I’m feeling “normal” today. My chronic pain is “normal.” That, of course, differs from those with lesser or greater chronic pain. It is, however, normal
normalizing love and lovingness Read More »
God, the determination of those who possess that misguided strength! Misguided in the sense that it, for all the world can see, takes them not only down an undesired path but one that is completely at odds with what they claim to be after. And keep going down it at the same rate as before,
awesome power of misguided strength, the Read More »
(Reposted from an earlier writing I abandoned for a bit. Inspired to share again by a fellow kinkster, @LovelyLolaTX) “If you can’t love yourself, you can’t love anyone else.” “If you don’t love you, why would anyone else?” “Learn to love yourself if you want someone to love you.” I don’t buy it. Not because
don’t love yourself? try loving someone else Read More »
Jealousy is an odd creature. Somewhat elusive, but incredibly pervasive. Oftentimes ill defined and poorly examined. Perhaps it’s my current Nyquil-addled brain, but I’ve been thinking about this emotion. I think it’s a fair assumption to say we generally think of jealousy as defensive love in vanilla culture. “You are mine, your love and affection
musings on jealousy Read More »
I understand hesitancy in romance. Okay, I might jump into bed with near strangers- but I am slower to connect emotionally. I instinctively freeze whenever I meet someone new. Even when I first met my master. He wasn’t right for me; I had strong feelings about his partner choices; I was a total mess and
what -exactly- are you waiting for, dear? Read More »
Questions When Beginning A Relationship (Romantic) A Living Document Love Languages: What does love mean to you? Look like? How do you give and receive romantic love? References: What are your “people” like? Your closest friends? Chosen family? Who might I run into at munches? Tell me about them. What would they say about you? Can I
mutual questionnaire when beginning a relationship: romance edition Read More »
There’s a lot of noise and confusion as you come into your own, as a queer person. For context, I have at least one child who is going through an active period of questioning and evolving her sexuality. At twelve, she’s already dealing with her own “noise.” Is she confused? Not really. Not anymore than
… can be exhausting. Justifying. Explaining. Listening to second hand lies. Of what or who I am, according to those who haven’t bothered to ask me. I am not queer enough. I am not attracted to enough bodies (why can’t you be pansexual?). Not loving enough, etc. etc. I live with a man, I play
living in a heterosexual relationship, as a bisexual being: part one: on being “enough” Read More »