“Compersion isn’t necessary in a relationship!” scream many in the polyamorous community. I understand it may be a difficult concept, but the truth is I find that sentiment, bluntly received, rather crap. If I care about your happiness in your life, and, yes, romantic relationships, I expect the same consideration in return. Why should I care […]
earned compersion vs. “natural” compersion Read More »
I realize after my last post that not everyone may be familiar with the term unicorn. Hence, a brief explanation.
short history of the unicorn: poly edition, a Read More »
I see it constantly. Couples seeking a bisexual woman. “Unicorn hunter!” they scream. There isn’t anything worse- in the polyamorous community- than wanting a “third.” Everyone wants their own perfect, SINGLE, female partner. Which, I guess, makes sense. It seems like such a dream for newly excited polyamorous couples. To find their perfect girlfriend. It’s
when unicorns are unicorn hunters Read More »
“Show up wearing nothing but a coat. I’ll be ready and waiting to cook your favorite meal, snuggle and watch a movie together, wake up lazily with kisses and serve you breakfast in bed.” I had a date like that with a former lover. Spoiled silly for an entire weekend, with someone who barely knew
what it’s like to “date” a polyamorous, aromantic lover Read More »
It’s a question I see come up now and again. Asexuals can absolutely be polyamorous, as romantic love does not have to be defined by sex. …but can aromantics be part of a ROMANTIC relationship structure, many ask? Well, yes and no. It depends on how you view romance. Is romance only flowers and Valentine’s
can you be aromantic and polyamorous? Read More »
In the movies, the “best” loves aren’t the first ones. Funny, isn’t it? In the movies, the main character often goes through several false attempt loves before they find their lasting connection. Sometimes they even need to experience those initial loves to appreciate their “last” love (at least so far as the movie goes.) This
privilege of being His second love, the Read More »
I like being independent. I love the idea of being my own person, all the time, without a care in the world. Solopoly, the idea of being polyamorous but remaining one’s own primary relationship. Without any of the burdens (though, yes, without some of the benefits) of a long term, committed, involved on every level
struggling with solopoly Read More »
Polyamory is NOT Just about having or wanting many, loving relationships -almost- ALL people want this and have this. Just because they “only” have one (or no) romantic relationships doesn’t mean they don’t have multiple, loving NON romantic relationships. Please avoid appearing like you believe you’re the only one with “too much love” to give
phrases to drop to avoid disparaging other forms of relationships: part one Read More »
I swear, I didn’t make these up. True relationship quotes I found from vanilla folk about polyamory and ENM (some responses are from me, others from actual responses from strangers). “I mean, respect to those who make this work, but I can’t understand how they don’t murder each other out of jealousy.” “If your best
people really are bad at relationships: part one Read More »
I found this comment by an insightful stranger very telling and deserving of thought every definition I looked up on the internet and books said ‘multiple romantic relationships’, every poly person I spoke with did not use the word ‘romantic’. They used emotional, intimate, affectionate, loving … but not one of them (and there were
when you’re polyamorous without the “amor” Read More »